The One

It reads: You're my one & only

Love, Tony

He Says Some Funny Stuff! (this should make you chuckle)

Ooma definately has a sense of humor. I love that we can laugh at and with each other.

TEASING EACH OTHER

TK: I need to run to the store and get more coffee if you're coming over and something for dinner. Oh and deodorant so I don't scare you off. And air freshener for your butt.

Gahlee! Holly: guess we could both use air fresher...MAINLY you and the dogs...I don't really fart

TK: Oh whatever

TK: Your rotten farts could kill

Gahlee! Holly: I'm rubber you're glue..

ON TRYING TO KEEP ME PLEASED

TK: I may fart in bed accidentally but I'll try not to

TK: And I think were doin fine as far as staying in budget. Maybe even buy u some week old tulips from the dollar store if u behave

TK: Sometimes I buy gifts for the hell of it tho

TK: Not just birthdays

TK: Specifically gas station flowers or hucks wine.

TK: I also buy cheeseburgers when mcds is running a special.

WHEN HE BABYSAT MY DOGS

TK: Chaos totally farted

Gahlee! Holly: hahahaha

Gahlee! Holly: probably you

TK: Nope heard it out her ass

Gahlee! Holly: she made a noise!?

Gahlee! Holly: hahahaha

TK: Yup.

Gahlee! Holly: are they behaving?

TK: Yes

TK: They want a cat

ON HIS CHARITY PHOTOSHOOT

TK: Well no photo shoot naked. I've got to wear clothes. Bastards

TK: I'm a piece of meat

ON FRIENDSHIPS

Gahlee! Holly: you know what’s become a tradition with AJ and I? We go to each other's hair appts just to visit with each other..isnt' that sweet?

TK: Aww Me n Jared talk on the toilet when we are poopin.

Gahlee! Holly: THAT'S BROMANCE

JUST PLAIN SMART

TK: I'm not gonna call u tubby cause I'm not goin there ever!

ON CAREERS

TK: Always go to the bathroom to avoid the boss!

TK: Snuck past the boss n he has no clue. It's cause I'm in my camo work uniform

TK: Eat more broccoli. Fart n scare off ur boss, stinky

ON DATING

TK: Ha ha. You'll never live it down. Blonde, pretty = trophy.

TK: Hell I had to buy that car just to get a date w u!

TK: We could at least pretend ur using me for my car

(PUBLISHERS NOTE: He sure has some interesting theories…and I told you guys about that beloved car of his.)

ON BEING HATEFUL (not to me)

TK: Fridays are my dick days

TK: Go slam ur foot in the fridge

TK: ima dick like that.

TK: Squeeze me and I'll fart. Touch me and I'll throw up.

TK: U should gargle thumbtacks so no one has to listen to u complain.

TK: New cf WOD. Strap 2 concrete blocks to ur feet and jump in the river. Amrap bubbles for time. 3.2.1...go!

TK: Quick! Grab ur scissors and sprint down main st.

TK: Go pick ur hemorrhoids n sit on a rusty fence!